1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down!

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Everytime someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'In'.

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Then once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions...switch to Espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks write... 'For smuggling diamonds'.

7. Finish all your sentences with 'In accordance with the prophecy'.

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify that your drive-thru order is 'To Go'.

12. Sing along at the Opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital, and ask why the poems don't rhyme?

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party cause your not in the mood.

16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name...rock bottom.

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream 'I Won! I Won!'

18. When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

19. Tell your children over dinner, 'Due to the economy we are going to have to let one of you go.'

20. Send e-mail back and forth to yourself engaging yourself in an intellectual debate. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.